I have suspicions that my partner of 8 years is sleeping around. We have a baby and we have had counselling, but I’ve recently found him on one-night stand and ‘hook-up’ sites, I found a receipt for a hotel room and a sex toy that I bought him was in his work bag.
His explanation was that his mum stayed at the hotel and he’d gone and paid for the room as she’d forgotten her card (but, the reservation was in his name?). He said he didn’t remember putting the sex toy in his work bag. And he said the dating sites were from when we were on a break (however, times and dates of emails don’t match). He also lies about his income, bills owing and stupid stuff, like whether he’s called his mum or not. And he also has another phone he now keeps in his work truck as he doesn’t want me to go through it.
We’ve both just finished our personal training course I’ve seen Facebook photos of him all over one of the girls from the course – and texts to her a couple of weeks later, telling her bullshit about being with the lads’ bike riding when he was at home with his son celebrating Easter. I’m obviously going through his stuff, but it’s because I have a constant, uneasy feeling that something’s not right. When I confront him I always get berated about how I don’t trust him, am in the wrong and how I am the psycho.
I want proof. I need to see it with my own eyes for it to hit home. Clearly I’m not stupid; there is something happening here but I just need evidence to support my suspicion. Do I have enough already? I’m losing sleep and need help. Melissa
You have enough. You have so much evidence you can’t sleep at night. What’s it going to take – walking in on him screwing some chick in your bed before you call bullshit on his flimsy justifications and explanations? I’m so sorry you’re going through this, and I know – believe me I know – the pain you must be in right now, but it’s time to act, Melissa.
You’re a smart woman and you’re not in denial. You’re just resisting making a plan for a future in which you can live and raise your kid in peace instead of spending your days in a flat spin wondering what his father will do / lie about next. So don’t let him make you think you’re crazy. And don’t doubt your intuition and make a choice that traps you because you had a kid together. It’s not worth it. It’s not.
Good luck my friend.
Love, reality chick