Help! My boyfriend acts like a 15 year old

Help! My boyfriend acts like a 15 year old

My boyfriend seems to have really nurtured his inner adolescent. Conversations with him are peppered with new random nicknames for me and everyone I know, quotes from his favourite films, breaking into 80s ballads (if something I say reminds him of a song from his youth) and pop quizzes about some cult TV show (I usually have no idea what he’s talking about).

Also, he knows I really dislike sport and yet yangs on about it endlessly. Basically, he talks to me like I’m one of his dude friends; but the kind of dude friend talk you have when you’re 15. His arrested development is driving me mad! Any thoughts? B

Don’t all guys have the inner teenager lurking? Many of my boyfriends have found fart jokes, adolescent pranks and men dressing in drag on footy shows absolutely hilarious. The problem is that your bloke wants you to join in the childish antics and start belting out Bon Jovi’s greatest hits while you watch the State of Origin – or trade Ferris Beuller quotes at every opportunity. Exhausting and futile.

Broker an agreement in the way he treats you. Ask him to tone down the boyish offensive and start talking to you like a grown up… and a lady. Don’t encourage him when he talks in movie quotes or pop quizzes: rather say – “Hmmm? Sorry sweetie, I don’t understand what you mean, could you just speak like a normal person?” Some of his behavior is a tiny bit charming. Perhaps choose to tolerate the quirky stuff that’s not too maddening and try to watch a couple of those cult TV shows and big footy matches with him.

You don’t have to ‘get it’ or even really enjoy it, but that weird stuff is part of him, and it’s lovable too. If he’s being especially teenage and refuses to cease with the dude-speak then tell him to go and hang out with his mates until he’s ready to act like a person old enough to have sex with you.

Love, reality chick

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Freelance journo, blogger, self-appointed advice-giver and co-author of Get Lucky. If you've got a dating or relationship issue, feel free to ask a question. (PS. You can also find me at The Mama Files and Letter To My Ex).

1 Comment

  1. Lola 6 years ago

    Boys will be boys?
    What a pity that their kind of fun ends up eroding communication! It seems there are a few otherwise reasonably cool guys that can’t give up on their teenage persona! My dad was into pranks, for example, and as much as we kids found them hilarious, my mother wouldn’t have a bar of it. Now I can understand and sympathise with her. Some other males in the family were into never speaking seriously at all, for example. You’d bring up a serious topic and they’d turn the whole thing into a big jackass joke. I had massive arguments with them which led me nowhere. With the benefit of hindsight, I’d behave differently if I had to be around some of my relos again. I can certainly understand how unbearable it can get if it’s your partner!
    Eternal Teenagers need to learn that we aren’t the same as them, and I believe that when they don’t get the validation they’re looking for (more laughter from their partners or family members), they can get the message fairly quickly.
    What’s more, they’re fucken boring…
    Best of luck, B!

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