How can I last longer in bed?

How can I last longer in bed?

longerMy girlfriend and I started having sex about three months ago.We weren’t very experienced and at first neither of us could reach climax. After getting some practice I started making her climax regularly. Then after more practice we both can now easily make each other climax. The sex just keeps getting better and better. But now I’m afraid that it might feel too good!

I find myself about to ejaculate right as she motions for me to go hard and fast because she is about to come. I then have to stop and try to perform oral to keep her going and give me a break. I need to find a way to build up some stamina or it’s back to wearing rubbers to reduce the intensity of my sensation thus making me last longer. Any tips? Tyler Loving

Hey Tyler. Thanks for writing in. I’ve got some ideas for you.

1. Masturbate before she arrives. It’ll help you slow down when you do get down to it. Ever see There’s Something About Mary? Priceless scene involving Ben Stiller and some … um… hair gel. Or rather, something that looks like hair gel but isn’t.

2. Train your willy. You can do this by stimulating your penis to the point of no return, then stopping the stimulation entirely just before you come. Keep repeating this pattern and eventually you’ll be able to hold off on orgasm for a longer time. (Your girlfriend can help you here, or you might want to practice on your own.)

3. Try different positions. Missionary might be your undoing, if it’s overstimulating you. Try more ‘shallow’ positions like side-on, entering her from behind while you’re both lying down, or seated positions where you face one another. Also, letting her ride ’em cowgirl and do all the work may also help you to last a bit longer.

4. Have more sex. It sounds like a no-brainer, but really, the more sessions you squeeze into a night, the more likely you’ll be chillaxing and taking your time to come by the last one. One of the best ways to build up stamina.

5. Don’t stress. It’s tricky not to, but really – the more you worry about arriving too early, so to speak, the more it’ll keep happening. If it does, just make a joke. A bit of humour and flattery never goes astray in the bedroom, especially during an awkward moment. ‘Honey, you’re a stone cold fox, what are you doing to me!’ will get you guys giggling about it and eradicate any weirdness.

Hope that helps, and feel free to come back and give us an update. We are terribly nosy and love hearing about whether our advice has, er, hit the spot.

Love, reality chick


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Freelance journo, blogger, self-appointed advice-giver and co-author of Get Lucky. If you've got a dating or relationship issue, feel free to ask a question. (PS. You can also find me at The Mama Files and Letter To My Ex).

1 Comment

  1. Lola 9 years ago

    Author Tracey Cox has written books which are “technically explicit” and fun to read. Besides, they bring in a wealth of information on other sexual matters. Cheers!

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