I said the L word waaay too early!

I said the L word waaay too early!

I have been seeing my boyfriend for three weeks. And two nights ago I broke THE cardinal rule and accidentally told him that I loved him. I know, three weeks. It’s bad. Worse, he didn’t really say anything or respond. He just kind of grinned at me in a goofy way and asked if I wanted more wine. That’s all.

I’ve barely managed to make eye contact with him since but we’re still together all the time, we have the best time and the best SEX I have ever had. The best. Honestly he is awesome in bed and I think that could be why I said it. But anyway, I know he wanted to take it slow because he got out of a long-term thing a year ago and now I’ve gone and stuffed it up. What do I do – Bring it up and laugh it off? Tell him I didn’t mean it? Pretend it never happened? Move to Siberia? Help!!! Too Hormonal For My Own Good

Hey, it slipped out. It happens. Trust me, the response could’ve been far worse than a grin and an offer of topping up your pinot grigio. Being high as a kite on great sex is truly awesome, but that cocktail of happy hormones you’re swimming in can impede our ability to know when we should blurt something out, and when we should shut the hell up. Hence, the L word conundrum. But, you’re good. I wouldn’t make any sudden moves (like to Siberia). Just keep it light, get your jollies, have fun and leave love out of it. In a few weeks or a few months, if things are still going swimmingly and you’re still having the best time and the best sex you’ve ever had, he might surprise you and say it. At which point you can smile sweetly at him and say, ‘That’s nice honey. Now, can I get you some more wine?’

Love, reality chick


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Freelance journo, blogger, self-appointed advice-giver and co-author of Get Lucky. If you've got a dating or relationship issue, feel free to ask a question. (PS. You can also find me at The Mama Files and Letter To My Ex).

1 Comment

  1. sue 10 years ago

    Yup, agree. I NEVER say it first. Even if I’m itching to say it first, I have made every one of my boyfriends take that step first!

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