In our latest quickies update, we offer advice to a woman who needs welfare assistance, and a husband whose wife is sick of hearing him say the L word. What the? Plus, we also counsel a woman whose boyfriend is holding back, and a reader who wants advice on dealing with bad boyfriend gifts. But – what about you? If you’ve got a curly question you’d like answered, write to us! You can email firstname.lastname@example.org or visit the Question Box.
Need welfare help
I am so glad I found you. Please help me. I am 29, a single mum with a 10-year-old son, and I have severe financial difficulties. I can’t pay my gas or electricity and I need to know where to go for help. Sharron
Sorry for your troubles, Sharron. As a starting point you should try Lifeline on 131 114 – they provide 24-hour telephone counselling and can refer you to community services that may be available. Another option is a phone call to the Credit and Debt HotLine on 1800 808 488. Mission Australia also has financial advisors who are also counsellors – try phoning them on 02 9718 8544. Wishing you all the best.
My wife just told me she is tired of me telling her that I love her. Is this a sign she wants to break up? Should I be worried? Ricky
Or dear. How many times a day do you utter your affections, Ricky? If you’re popping out those three little words as she eats her weetbix, makes the school lunches, irons her work shirt, serves up takeaway and watches Masterchef, then it might be overkill. Tone it down a little and let her come to you with the sweet nothings for a change!
My man’s a closed book
My boyfriend has admitted he is worried about hurting me because he holds back in the relationship. It’s something that he finds himself doing unconsciously because he’s been hurt before. What do I do about this? Anon
You know the saying, once bitten, twice shy? That’s bollocks. You’ve got to call him on all the unconscious ways he holds back – whether that involves not telling you he loves you regularly or just not being honest and open with you. Demand he join you at the intimacy party, and let him know that love is a dangerous game, but there’s no point standing on the sidelines. You may as well be single.
I hate his dodgy gifts
The last few presents I have received from my partner have been not to my taste. How do I broach this with him without offending him? A couple of them should be worn, and they just don’t suit me. Believe me I am grateful for receiving a gift, but it’s a bit tricky isn’t it? Cheeky Monkey
Many a girlfriend has endured the curse of the bad boyfriend gift. It’s always an awkward scenario – particularly if the offending item has to be buttoned up and paraded out in public. There’s no easy way to tell a partner they got it wrong. So don’t. It’s nice just to get a present, and it’s better to be grateful for the gesture and just suck it up (or find a dark, dusty corner in the closet to hide that leopard print mini skirt) In the future, just tell him what you want by circling the items on a catalogue – it’s easier.