We never even came close to it – in fact we fought about when he might actually be ready to do it – and now he’s getting hitched to some chick he’s known six months. We were together for 4 years, and I just can’t stop obsessing about this. Help! Abby
Ouch. Few things bite more than a non-committal ex who gets engaged before the dust has barely settled on his last break-up. Unless of course, it’s a newly-engaged ex who can’t wait to get on the phone to ruin your day with his big news (don’t you just hate people who gloat).
You only have to look at Hollywood’s dating track record to see that rebound marriages have about a snowball’s chance in hell of working out, but many guys do this. It’s like they’re playing a big game of marital musical chairs, and when the music stops, they finally stop faffing about and settle down, even if it’s with someone they barely know. Some would call it timing. Some would say the one before ‘The One’ wasn’t the right one in the first place. But no theories change the fact that women who put in the hard yards to turn a dude who’s rough around the edges into decent husband material are often left behind while the next girl reaps the benefits.
I know it’s hard, but you’re going to have to let go of this one, Abby. Look on the bright side: somewhere out there, is a guy other women have tirelessly trained up into decent boyfriend material. Chances are they now think he’s a total bastard – but he could just be your Mr Right, because in the dating realm that’s just how the cookie crumbles.
Love, reality chick