QUICKIES: Will my model girlfriend cheat while she’s away? | What is my long-distance guy trying to tell me? | Can friends who become lovers go back to being friends? | I feel like I’m nothing to her, what did I do wrong?

QUICKIES: Will my model girlfriend cheat while she’s away? | What is my long-distance guy trying to tell me? | Can friends who become lovers go back to being friends? | I feel like I’m nothing to her, what did I do wrong?

RC is asked questions on all topics. Sometimes, the letters sent in inspire an essay (or close). Other times, just a few lines will do – and all those letters are popped into a semi-regular section called quickies. It’s just how it sounds – a short, fast dose of RC advice. Don’t forget, if you need advice from RC or the Manswers team, drop us a line via the Question Box.

Will my model girlfriend cheat while she’s away?

My fiance of four years was recently granted a modelling contract, and will be flown up to NYC for her first shoot. I’m ecstatic for her, because she’s always wanted to do it. However, it is partially nude modelling, and she’s had issues with infidelity in the past. I want her to be happy, but it’s tearing me up inside. What do I do? Gino

Tell her how ecstatic you are, kiss her goodbye and tell her you can’t wait to see how gorgeous she looks in the photos. The alternative – admitting how freaked out and worried you are that her job could threaten your future – won’t do your relationship any favours. We can’t control anyone’s choices in a relationship and while it’s bloody hard at times, all we can do is trust that they’ll make the right ones.

What is my long-distance boyfriend trying to tell me?

I’ve been seeing a guy for about six months now. He’s great and I’ve fallen for him. We live far away from each other but we’ve made the effort to have quality time together. That is, until recently. He’s been distant and blames it on being busy and stressed. I gave him all the time he needed but it’s been a week now and he still hasn’t contacted me. I check my whatsapp and he’s either online or was there a few minutes ago, but he doesn’t write to me. Could there be something wrong? Is he trying to tell me something with this attitude? Please help. I’m confused. Kirsten

Hard to say, but my gut feel is that he’s not quite as busy or as stressed as he makes out. If I were you, I’d ring him or go to see him and ask him directly where things stand with you.

Friends and lovers

Once friends become lovers can they ever go back to being friends? Reggie

Absolutely, although it may be a bit weird at first.

It feels like I was nothing to her; what did I do wrong?

I started dating this girl who’d been a friend first. She’d recently split from her ex, who she’d dated for a year. He tried to pressure her into having sex (she wouldn’t do it), and he cheated on her and she dumped him. At first we were just good friends. I had been through a heartbreak too so I could relate – then after about a month, we started dating. Right before our three month anniversary, she tells me that I was nothing but a rebound. Not even 24 hours later she is back with her ex. What did I do wrong? I was amazing to her and loved her and now it feels like I was nothing to her. Will

She really told you that you were nothing but a rebound? Nice. Unfortunately, your story is an all-too-common one. Jumping into relationships with people still raw from a split is a dangerous move. Mostly, it doesn’t work. We all need time to process break ups and how long that takes differs for everyone. Obviously your ex was still hung up on HER ex (why, given their history, is a mystery) and while it may not feel like it yet, you’re better off without her. Take care, Will.


Got a question for RC or the Manswers team? Drop a line in

the RC Question Box! (Questions may be edited.)
Freelance journo, blogger, self-appointed advice-giver and co-author of Get Lucky. If you've got a dating or relationship issue, feel free to ask a question. (PS. You can also find me at The Mama Files and Letter To My Ex).

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