Should I dump my shy guy?

Should I dump my shy guy?

I’ve been seeing this guy since November. He’s really sweet and shy and he comes up with the best date ideas. We have so much in common and when we talk about something we love, we can talk for hours and have an awesome time. The problem, I think, is that we’re both too shy to make any real moves – and things have stalled.

I feel like we always talk about the same things over and over again and while I loved that about him in the beginning, I feel that things have gotten boring and perhaps he’s a little TOO shy for me. I used to think that opposites attracted (and have thought that perhaps I should go back to the more hands on, dominating guy though they never well). But would I be a total bitch if I dumped him because I’m bored? Amber

No, but are you really ready to dump a guy who goes out on a limb to think up cool dates for you and who you have so much in common with? There are the makings of something great here, Amber; something far better than those flash-in-the-pan flings with guys who have all the moves but zero desire to know the real you. And with a little courage, it might be easier than you think to move things to that deeper stage that comes after all those early months of politeness, being on your best behaviour, pretending you never fart etc etc.

In short, you guys need a little less talking and a little more action. You don’t say if there has been any action at all, or if you’ve been languishing in this platonic, Jane Austen-style limbo for months on end. That could mean that there’s not enough sizzle for either of you to make a move, or you really are both too shy. But carpe diem, Amber! It’s the things we don’t do that we regret, so if you fancy him, make a move (if he won’t). Take a chance and you’ll soon know if this thing has legs. Good luck!

Love, reality chick


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Freelance journo, blogger, self-appointed advice-giver and co-author of Get Lucky. If you've got a dating or relationship issue, feel free to ask a question. (PS. You can also find me at The Mama Files and Letter To My Ex).

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